Hey Reader,

Each week in this newsletter I answer a question from a reader. This week’s question comes from a comms manager in California who asks:

As a lifelong introvert who hated (and dreaded) any form of public speaking for many years, I’m glad you sent me this question. Because over the years I’ve gone from "I HATE PUBLIC SPEAKING" into a calmer place of “This is actually kind of no big deal”.

How did I get my brain to make that switch? How did I learn to get over the fear and the nerves?

Let’s talk about it in today’s newsletter.

When Laura Kennedy joined The Curious Tribe, she felt really intimidated by the idea of public speaking. She’s like me, quite introverted, and she was shy as a kid.

Standing up in front of a room full of people was the last thing she wanted to do, and she never in a million years thought she’d actually enjoy it or seek it out.

But guess what, she changed her mind since joining the tribe and working with me. Here’s what Laura says in her own words:

The Curious Tribe is my community for internal comms pros who want to have a great career, make an impact at work and enjoy themselves at the same time. With an NPS of +81 and 85% of members renewing for a second year or more, this is a world-class community and I’m so proud of it.

Laura’s been in the tribe since I first opened the doors in December 2023 and has renewed every year since.

Are you the next member of The Curious Tribe? 👀

Alright let’s get into it. How do you get past the fear of public speaking and become okay with it?

An expert's insights

When I was struggling with this, I spent a lot of time reading articles online, watching YouTube videos, searching for advice that would actually help me.

One person that helped me a lot is a LinkedIn creator called Lorraine K. Lee. I found her on LinkedIn by accident one day and knew she would be helpful to me because she also identifies as an introvert and she does public speaking for a living. She also teaches on LinkedIn Learning and on Masterclass, so she’s confident on camera and good at presenting.

She gave me hope, there must be a way to get better at this!

I reached out to her with today’s reader question and asked for what advice she’d share. Here’s what she said:

It’s helpful to first remember that everyone gets nervous, and it’s a natural biological response. As a professional public speaker, I still get nervous! Nerves can actually be a good thing as long as they don’t take over. They help us be more focused, alert, and present.

A lot of it comes down to practice. This means practicing aloud (most of my coaching clients only run through presentations in their head) and then getting feedback afterwards to keep improving.

Q&A is also a place we can practice, and AI is a great tool for this to ask you the hard questions. If you don’t know the answer in the moment, the way you respond can still show your authority and credibility. Stumbling through and making something up is what a lot of people do and where they lose credibility with executives, but if you can let the question asker know that you want to look into it after the meeting because you want to make sure you give the most thorough and accurate answer possible, and you’ll respond by 5 pm PT that day, you’ll earn their respect because you communicated clearly and honestly.

Btw Lorraine also kindly offered all readers of my newsletter a 5-day email course to help you improve your presentation skills – you can get that here:

Practice, practice, practice

Now one thing Lorraine said that helped me a lot, and might help you too, is about practice. If you ever see me speaking on a webinar or at a conference and you think “jeepers she’s very good at this”, then please know it’s NOT a natural talent. I have practiced over and over and over again for many many hours to come across as polished and capable!

Last year I was the keynote speaker at the Public Relations Society of America annual conference and I honestly cannot tell you how many times I practiced my talk. I walked around my house saying it out loud while I did laundry, while I loaded the dishwasher, while I dried my hair. I reckon my husband must have been sick of hearing it haha.

Practice is a big investment of your time but for me it was the only thing that helped. Because when you feel ready and you know your stuff, the nerves definitely do calm down and the whole thing feels a bit easier.

Get your opening lines perfect

Something else that helped me SO MUCH was a simple trick I read online somewhere:

• Nerves peak in the first sixty seconds of your presentation and then they settle. So the bit to prepare hardest is your first 2 -3 sentences.

I have found, through experience and practice, that this advice is very true. If you fumble your opening then it will make your nerves worse. But if you get your opening exactly the way you want it, with the right words and the right pitch, you’ll feel better and your confidence will increase.

If you ever see me on a Workvivo webinar where I do a very dramatic off-camera intro at the start “And now ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage your host, Joanna Parsons”, please know I AM READING THAT FROM A PIECE OF PAPER! I know that if I fumble at the start and say my name wrong (it’s entirely possible) then I’m doomed. But if I can be sure of getting the opening right then we're firing on all cylinders.

How to handle the Q&A

Now the big thing you can’t really practice or rehearse is a live Q&A. You might still feel nervous about this bit, that’s ok, it’s totally normal.

Anytime I do a webinar with my friends at Workvivo, we always include a live Q&A at the end and that’s the bit that still makes me a bit nervous! What if someone asks me something that I have no clue about or something beyond my expertise?

Well here’s the thing that helped me and might help you too:

• It’s okay not to have the answer.

Why did it take me years to realise this? I have no idea. (You might say I don’t know the answer haha).

But seriously, if you’re in a Q&A and someone asks you something that you genuinely don’t know the answer to, don’t worry about it. Try something like:

"That’s a great question, I actually don’t know the answer but I can find out for you. I’ll come back to you next week".

See how easy that is? It’s a bad idea to try to answer anyway, you’ll end up waffling on about nothing and people will grow bored (or worse, annoyed).

I hope this helps. Honestly if you hate public speaking, you’re not alone, most people dread it and actively avoid it. The only way to get better at it is to face your fear, find opportunities to speak and then practice, practice, practice. The practice may be boring but it really truly does work.

Thanks for reading and stay curious,

Joanna

Find me on YouTube, TikTok, LinkedIn and check out my book​

Want to work together?

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This newsletter is not written with AI. It's a joy to write this with my human brain every week. I love writing it and I hope you enjoy reading it.

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